Friday, May 21, 2010

Changes In A Blink Of The Eye

Dont you think it is crazy how life changes in a blink of the eye or a neno second ? Yesterday Ed and I learned that a dear friend L had been rushed the the hospital the day prior (he was cooking outside and passed out ). It is later found out that it is serious .so serious L has had brain surgery (Im waiting on results now from L daughter ) Ed and I will be going to the hospital later this evening to be with the family.
Its crazy Ed just talked to L the other day ..and then he is in serious condition and is having brain surgery . Im telling you this has schook me to the core ! It seems that all around us our friends are truly falling ..times seem hard is tight ..bills are do ..repairs need to be made ..the list goes on and on ..I just am wondering when the clif around me is going to stop eroarding away ..when can it feel like everything is in a free fall ! Ill tell you that L is a good friend has been for years and for this to happen is devasating to me as a whole ! I want to run and help his children (they already lost thier Mom to cancer a couple years back ) I cant imange how they are feeling or what they are feeling (they watched and took care of thier mom until she became a angel ) my heart bleeds and my tears over flow. How do I help those kids ? how do I make things better then they are for them right now ? How do I give them strenth when I feel so weak ? How dose is all this going to turn out ? My mind wonders to places it shouldnt be . My heart hurts deep inside DEEP? All this seems so sencless and has so much heart ake mind blowing Im telling you .Yes I pray you better belive it ..but there has to be more there has to be somthing that Ed and I can help with but we cant find it ..I didnt sleep well last night my minds been racing and Im just tore up .
I have told aone person (my best freind ) . I know I am safe here no one reads this blog and no one knows who L is so I can talk . Its so hard to think about as well as write about . O know one thing I want L to be alright ..I want those children to have their only living parent ..I want our friend to be there ... I want to be there to encourge L and his children ...I want to have open arms for his hurting children ...I want alot that has nothing to do with me ..Ill do anything and what god insturcts my heart to do ..Its just so hard and gut wrenching ! L has 5 kids for 16 to 23 this is what keeps laying on my heart ...I dont understand any of this and am asking why these kids have to go through the life changing events that have endured..I have to admit I am scared of what the out come will be ..I almost want to hide from it you know? Then on the other hand I know how strong L is and how he LOVES his children .L is a fighter so I Belive in L and his strenth